I don’t know if you read the Mumbai mirror and read the horrifying stories about mentally & physically challenged kids in the government run shelters. Its quite shocking and actually you begin wondering that there people who are abusing kids who don’t even know what’s wrong with them.
The first story was about the kids at Kavdas orphanage where kids were malnourished, with no proper sanitation facilities and death after death with inadequate funds to support or give these children the bare necessities. Only because the story was reported some action was taken and these kids were moved from there. After that we have stories every alternate day reporting that are similar. One at the panvel childrens home where there were deaf & dumb children being raped by the care takers & other random men in the vicinity until some one figured out the scandal. Then we had the two pedophiles who ran orphanages under the garb of charity to fulfill their sexual desires. And now we have the same situation reported across all orphanages in Maharashtra. Lack of sanitation conditions, mentally & physically challenged children being kept in the same room. The children are not toilet trained, girls & boys who are 14 – 15 are left in the same room with only their undergarments on, kids from 14 – 70 years are all in the same shelter. Water tanks kept open and there is no adequate medical help and children who suffer from TB, pneumonia and other respiratory diseases are not given any special medical attention. Click here and here to read the article
This actually reminds me on how I am so careful that my daughter has boiled water, she wears proper clothes, how I spend sleepless nights when she has a minor cough & cold, her fine motor skills are gross motor skills are being developed well.
These stories actually bring so many questions in my mind. Why does god make special children? Why cant god just make everybody the same? Its somebody’s right to be normal and please they are innocent children. How can he be so cruel? Even though I don’t agree that children should be deprived of anything even if he did, he should give them birth in families who are financially, emotionally & physically capable of raising them and not in homes where parents who think of these children as a burden and leave them in these shelter homes to face whatever life has in store for them. As a mother I cannot believe how can any mother have the courage to leave their own child good, bad, ugly to fend life for themselves and especially if he is not capable of doing so. Again god I want to ask you why do you do this?
Why are people so selfish that they want to make money out of these children by taking away the funds that are granted for these kids. I want to ask to the government that the allowance per child hasn’t been raised since the 1960’s. How are these shelter homes even suppose to make do with the funds allocated with the rise in inflation? How much does the Child & Welfare Committee head spend on his own son/daughter? How can he therefore think that these kids don’t even deserve enough to have basic necessities?
How I wish there were corporates who would come forward and address these issues and take them up. Why wouldn’t a Dettol, J&J, Parle, Nestle, etc come forward and support these organizations in kind. Trust me all the mothers who are your target audience would have new found respect for you. You would have already won them over.
Its sad that we usually like special things and usually wait for them. Our hands shrivel up only when the special is not beautiful. It’s only then that we feel even if it is special I don't want it!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Monday, March 21, 2011
Big Shout out to Mad Momma
This is one blog I absolutely love reading. Simple yet so cool. I love all her posts there are funny, serious, thoughtful but they all have a very deep human thought to it.
Do drop in and read Mad Momma One post that I think will get you thinking and make you smile if you were born in late seventies, early 80's 90's songs I am embarrassed to admit I like
Do drop in and read Mad Momma One post that I think will get you thinking and make you smile if you were born in late seventies, early 80's 90's songs I am embarrassed to admit I like
Un - Clan!
Don’t think the show KWK would have got great TRP’s last night but honestly I thought it was a fab show. One for Karan to call people he doesn’t hang out with all the time so it gets interesting and they have a different perspective vs. the same stuff and aura that he brings to the show. Secondly to call a guy who is just so honest & has such a brilliant attitude to life.
Honestly until yesterday I didn’t care much about John Abraham and thought he was a guy with a fab body and the only movies I loved him in were Jism, New York, Dhoom & Dostana. Yesterday after the show which they promoted as a really sex – y show with John being this ultimate sex baba or something was just so much more than that.
When he was asked questions on Bipasha he refused to comment saying its personal and he doesn’t care of what the speculation is. Then he had no qualms about admitting that he is often not the first choice for a lot of movies and he is ok with it. Wow he is really a solid guy, I mean literally. One is to know it and be comfortable with it and the other is to publicly acknowledge it. Cant seem to understand how people do that, na!
As the show moved on to the rapid fire round I was quite amazed at his response to a lot of the answers. Sonam Kapoor great pretty looking girl, very honest, etc. But the answers I absolutely loved were:
Q: Imran, Ranbir or shahid the star you would bet your money on
A: why would I bet my money on
Q: Shahrukh, Salman or Aamir the Khan of all seasons
A: Karan why are you clannish? Why cant we have Devgans or Kapoors or Singhs. Ajay Devgan has delivered the biggest hits last year
With this answer Karan Johar was actually stumped and I think even he realized that he was clannish.
We all have our comfort zones and just want to move about in the same zone. It takes so much more of us to break away from the good old stuff and say or do something different. All the guests on the show made choices with whatever question they got vs. just thinking it could be a different response.
Big bow to John for doing just that and being so brutally honest. Lesson well taught! Karan are you listening?
Honestly until yesterday I didn’t care much about John Abraham and thought he was a guy with a fab body and the only movies I loved him in were Jism, New York, Dhoom & Dostana. Yesterday after the show which they promoted as a really sex – y show with John being this ultimate sex baba or something was just so much more than that.
When he was asked questions on Bipasha he refused to comment saying its personal and he doesn’t care of what the speculation is. Then he had no qualms about admitting that he is often not the first choice for a lot of movies and he is ok with it. Wow he is really a solid guy, I mean literally. One is to know it and be comfortable with it and the other is to publicly acknowledge it. Cant seem to understand how people do that, na!
As the show moved on to the rapid fire round I was quite amazed at his response to a lot of the answers. Sonam Kapoor great pretty looking girl, very honest, etc. But the answers I absolutely loved were:
Q: Imran, Ranbir or shahid the star you would bet your money on
A: why would I bet my money on
Q: Shahrukh, Salman or Aamir the Khan of all seasons
A: Karan why are you clannish? Why cant we have Devgans or Kapoors or Singhs. Ajay Devgan has delivered the biggest hits last year
With this answer Karan Johar was actually stumped and I think even he realized that he was clannish.
We all have our comfort zones and just want to move about in the same zone. It takes so much more of us to break away from the good old stuff and say or do something different. All the guests on the show made choices with whatever question they got vs. just thinking it could be a different response.
Big bow to John for doing just that and being so brutally honest. Lesson well taught! Karan are you listening?
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Money Cant buy!!!
As always its children who teach me the small joys of life and make me realize that life is beautiful no matter where you are. Its just the people you are with who matter the most.
A few days ago I was waiting at the Babulnath temple waiting for some one and while I waited inside patiently I saw these small young street kids playing with literally anything that came their way. There were these jungle gym kind of construction climbers that they played. How I wish I had my camera to capture the moment. A thought that passed my mind instantly was and yeah it just came rushing through was how I taught my daughter to use the jungle gym at the garden everyday asking her to be careful as she took each step and here these kids just learn the ropes of life without any support or guidance. They loved their time on the bamboos and I , loved watching them.
Your kids don't know the price of the toy you give them they know the time you spend with them. To them its not a Barbie doll its a doll. You taught them or society taught them its a Barbie and shes pretty and good. They don't know expensive, cheap, costly. These words are not part of their dictionary yet.
Just today I thought I will take her to a friends building where there was music, food & rain dance but something within me told me that she would rather enjoy where her friends are and all the other frills will not make her as happy as playing with her own friends. I am glad I did what my daughter liked and not what suited me
Just yesterday when I was at a book store with my daughter and another mom was teaching her daughter modes of transport, bus, car, truck etc. The baby asked her mom why don't we travel by bus it must be fun. The mom said its dirty and only people who don't have cars travel by bus. My point is not that you let them do whatever they want to but don't influence their decisions. Let them experience it. They are in their formative years and must know and experience everything.
For all those moms who think bus rides are dirty try it. sit atop a double decker bus in the front seat and feel the breeze through your hair and see the smiles on your child's face. These are experiences money can't buy!
A few days ago I was waiting at the Babulnath temple waiting for some one and while I waited inside patiently I saw these small young street kids playing with literally anything that came their way. There were these jungle gym kind of construction climbers that they played. How I wish I had my camera to capture the moment. A thought that passed my mind instantly was and yeah it just came rushing through was how I taught my daughter to use the jungle gym at the garden everyday asking her to be careful as she took each step and here these kids just learn the ropes of life without any support or guidance. They loved their time on the bamboos and I , loved watching them.
Your kids don't know the price of the toy you give them they know the time you spend with them. To them its not a Barbie doll its a doll. You taught them or society taught them its a Barbie and shes pretty and good. They don't know expensive, cheap, costly. These words are not part of their dictionary yet.
Just today I thought I will take her to a friends building where there was music, food & rain dance but something within me told me that she would rather enjoy where her friends are and all the other frills will not make her as happy as playing with her own friends. I am glad I did what my daughter liked and not what suited me
Just yesterday when I was at a book store with my daughter and another mom was teaching her daughter modes of transport, bus, car, truck etc. The baby asked her mom why don't we travel by bus it must be fun. The mom said its dirty and only people who don't have cars travel by bus. My point is not that you let them do whatever they want to but don't influence their decisions. Let them experience it. They are in their formative years and must know and experience everything.
For all those moms who think bus rides are dirty try it. sit atop a double decker bus in the front seat and feel the breeze through your hair and see the smiles on your child's face. These are experiences money can't buy!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Sunscreen
Sunscreen!
Don’t know why I am reminded of the song sunscreen that makes me feel less guilty of all the not so approved choices I would like to make in life.
It makes me feel a little less miserable about wanting the sun, moon and the stars without having to work for it, or feel normal if I don’t know what my calling is. Making me believe that life isn’t perfect and actually love and accept my imperfections.
It gives me the confidence to make choices which need a lot of courage otherwise, being sensitive to life and other humans who god has not been so kind to.
It gives me the happiness to spend time with my daughter all of 18 months versus being in a work place that’s otherwise aspirational. Making me understand that this time is never going to come back and I need to make the most of it to have no regrets later. I know her little hands want me now to guide them and instill right values today, to play the stupidest games, get dirty in the garden, spill food all over, sneak and eat chocolates but I still want to do it. I want to spend hours reading to her and cuddling her in bed which for most of us is a luxury.
I want to spend time with my parents today knowing that everyday is a day less with them. It makes me want to love them and be loved as it’s a day less of their love, care and shelter.
Love life to the fullest without having to regret any day of my life. Allowing me to fall and taste the flavour of success and failure both.
It makes me cherish, love and relive every moment of my youth. It makes me feel beautiful even if I am fat and not be glued on to beauty magazines cause they promote low self esteem.
It makes me want to invest in me and all those relationships I left behind when I thought I didn’t have time. I want to invest in them now. I want to learn pottery even if I may never mould a beautiful one.
It makes me want to learn a language even if I may never speak one. It makes me want to sing or play along even if it may not sound right. It makes me want to dance even if it’s only my mom who appreciates it.
It makes me want to see all those beautiful places in the world which are less traveled and where people don’t judge me by my name or status.
It makes me think and ponder within, have a conversation with myself which I otherwise choose to ignore everyday.
It makes me…..
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Don’t know why I am reminded of the song sunscreen that makes me feel less guilty of all the not so approved choices I would like to make in life.
It makes me feel a little less miserable about wanting the sun, moon and the stars without having to work for it, or feel normal if I don’t know what my calling is. Making me believe that life isn’t perfect and actually love and accept my imperfections.
It gives me the confidence to make choices which need a lot of courage otherwise, being sensitive to life and other humans who god has not been so kind to.
It gives me the happiness to spend time with my daughter all of 18 months versus being in a work place that’s otherwise aspirational. Making me understand that this time is never going to come back and I need to make the most of it to have no regrets later. I know her little hands want me now to guide them and instill right values today, to play the stupidest games, get dirty in the garden, spill food all over, sneak and eat chocolates but I still want to do it. I want to spend hours reading to her and cuddling her in bed which for most of us is a luxury.
I want to spend time with my parents today knowing that everyday is a day less with them. It makes me want to love them and be loved as it’s a day less of their love, care and shelter.
Love life to the fullest without having to regret any day of my life. Allowing me to fall and taste the flavour of success and failure both.
It makes me cherish, love and relive every moment of my youth. It makes me feel beautiful even if I am fat and not be glued on to beauty magazines cause they promote low self esteem.
It makes me want to invest in me and all those relationships I left behind when I thought I didn’t have time. I want to invest in them now. I want to learn pottery even if I may never mould a beautiful one.
It makes me want to learn a language even if I may never speak one. It makes me want to sing or play along even if it may not sound right. It makes me want to dance even if it’s only my mom who appreciates it.
It makes me want to see all those beautiful places in the world which are less traveled and where people don’t judge me by my name or status.
It makes me think and ponder within, have a conversation with myself which I otherwise choose to ignore everyday.
It makes me…..
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Saturday, April 24, 2010
Exposure
So am at the parlour getting my hair done and see this mom here with her two teenage daughters. While the mom is a simple and elegant lady the daughters gorgeous and full of themselves.
Ok so she is all of 15 and gets her hair washed, cut and dried. Her nails perfect and while her mom gets her hair cut she can't stop admiring herself in the mirror flipping her hair from one side to the other, playing with the bands and ofcourse clicking her own photos. She stands in front of the mirror and poses with a profile and a pout... So perfect that I have already drifted 10 years away when my daughter will do the same thing and how will I react.
Anyways can't blame these kids for what they are going through cause as parents somewhere we are the ones who have exposed them to all that they know. While all these thoughts are going through my head the other daughter whose all of 10 asks the hair stylist for some hair serum to settle the frizz. I wonder when I was 10 did I even know or care whether my hair was frizzy or what serum is?
Coming back to exposure its such a thin line where you don't know if its the right or not. Gadgets, gizmos, movies, parties, clubs, make up. Every bit of it the kids are exposed to so much and they are learning it all from us.
While the girl is taking her own pics she is tucking her stomach in to ensure whatever little flesh that she has is also not seen. Obviously fitness is among the top 10 on their priority list.
So before they leave they do their eyes, dab some lip gloss all ofcourse of their mom, coz its all expensive. They rather use their money on stuff their mom doesn't buy.
In all of this forgot that I'd actually come for relaxing hair spa... Which is over... Damn
Ok so she is all of 15 and gets her hair washed, cut and dried. Her nails perfect and while her mom gets her hair cut she can't stop admiring herself in the mirror flipping her hair from one side to the other, playing with the bands and ofcourse clicking her own photos. She stands in front of the mirror and poses with a profile and a pout... So perfect that I have already drifted 10 years away when my daughter will do the same thing and how will I react.
Anyways can't blame these kids for what they are going through cause as parents somewhere we are the ones who have exposed them to all that they know. While all these thoughts are going through my head the other daughter whose all of 10 asks the hair stylist for some hair serum to settle the frizz. I wonder when I was 10 did I even know or care whether my hair was frizzy or what serum is?
Coming back to exposure its such a thin line where you don't know if its the right or not. Gadgets, gizmos, movies, parties, clubs, make up. Every bit of it the kids are exposed to so much and they are learning it all from us.
While the girl is taking her own pics she is tucking her stomach in to ensure whatever little flesh that she has is also not seen. Obviously fitness is among the top 10 on their priority list.
So before they leave they do their eyes, dab some lip gloss all ofcourse of their mom, coz its all expensive. They rather use their money on stuff their mom doesn't buy.
In all of this forgot that I'd actually come for relaxing hair spa... Which is over... Damn
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Indian Emotional Attyachaar
This one is clean, simple easy. We as Indians love the rona, dhona, sacrifice and playing sad songs at every occasion. While I was at moms the other day and she watched some crappy soap on TV where the women were all piling on to another woman and she cried and howled but in vain. Switch to another soap where the daughter is getting married and inspite of the fact that we cry on certain songs like “ye galiyan, ye chobara, yahaan aana na dobara….from Prem Rog, the girl was insistent on danciong to that song. Now don’t we all know that yes leaving moms is a really big toughie but got to do it and then to instigate those tears we play these emotional songs that make us cry? While I went back to my wedding days thinking of my sangeet(song & dance evening) my mom was already crying thinking of her daughters abroad and how they have been married for so long, and work so hard and they haven’t come home for so long….phew…mom, mom, mom I said, please relax….but the ganga jamuna saraswati had to flow.
We as Indians just love all this emotional drama, that’s why our movies which are actually a reflection of our society exhibit this so well. Think of all those movies for a while that made you cry…Masoom, Hum aapke hain kaun, actually all the Karan Johar & sooraj Barjatiya types. We love the pain & pathos. Think of all those times when you listened to songs continuously that made you cry….Whenever we see something sad, we want to believe that it’s happening to us or could happen to us and we get so involved in the whole process that it makes us weak. When we see someone sick or unhappy we immediately empathize thinking god please this should never happen to me.
Our reason to connect and belong is what gets us caught into this emotional drama all the time. We are so into each others lives and space that everything affects us all the time. And women especially believe that all the bad and good of fiction will definitely happen to them so they always want to be ready all the time. Sounds familiar huh! Think of all those times when you asked (if you are a girl)/ you were asked by your girlfriend after a watching a movie about infidelity, “will you ever be disloyal to me?”, or “will you ever cheat on me for any other woman?” Or after a great show on travel & living or a bolly flick shot in some well shot international locale, “Baby when will we go to such beautiful places”. You never take me anywhere…no you don’t love me…when was the last time you gave me a gift.” For women materialistic gifts have a longer memory, only because we can flaunt it. So men by default are always wrong.
So coming back to moms while I was there for my brief stay with her we watched all the sangeet DVD’s of all my sisters and my wedding… my mom cried and blushed as she saw her daughters perform and thought nobody can dance better than her daughters. I spent the rest of the two days with lots of fun and followed the soaps that they watched religiously on TV that persuaded me to write about Emotional Attyachaar
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We as Indians just love all this emotional drama, that’s why our movies which are actually a reflection of our society exhibit this so well. Think of all those movies for a while that made you cry…Masoom, Hum aapke hain kaun, actually all the Karan Johar & sooraj Barjatiya types. We love the pain & pathos. Think of all those times when you listened to songs continuously that made you cry….Whenever we see something sad, we want to believe that it’s happening to us or could happen to us and we get so involved in the whole process that it makes us weak. When we see someone sick or unhappy we immediately empathize thinking god please this should never happen to me.
Our reason to connect and belong is what gets us caught into this emotional drama all the time. We are so into each others lives and space that everything affects us all the time. And women especially believe that all the bad and good of fiction will definitely happen to them so they always want to be ready all the time. Sounds familiar huh! Think of all those times when you asked (if you are a girl)/ you were asked by your girlfriend after a watching a movie about infidelity, “will you ever be disloyal to me?”, or “will you ever cheat on me for any other woman?” Or after a great show on travel & living or a bolly flick shot in some well shot international locale, “Baby when will we go to such beautiful places”. You never take me anywhere…no you don’t love me…when was the last time you gave me a gift.” For women materialistic gifts have a longer memory, only because we can flaunt it. So men by default are always wrong.
So coming back to moms while I was there for my brief stay with her we watched all the sangeet DVD’s of all my sisters and my wedding… my mom cried and blushed as she saw her daughters perform and thought nobody can dance better than her daughters. I spent the rest of the two days with lots of fun and followed the soaps that they watched religiously on TV that persuaded me to write about Emotional Attyachaar
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